Review: The Wrong End of the Table by Ayser Salman

The Wrong End of the Table by Ayser Salman (3/5/2019 from Skyhorse)

**Disclaimer: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review**

Goodreads Summary:
You know that feeling of being at the wrong end of the table? Like you’re at a party but all the good stuff is happening out of earshot (#FOMO)? That’s life—especially for an immigrant.
What happens when a shy, awkward Arab girl with a weird name and an unfortunate propensity toward facial hair is uprooted from her comfortable (albeit fascist-regimed) homeland of Iraq and thrust into the cold, alien town of Columbus, Ohio—with its Egg McMuffins, Barbie dolls, and kids playing doctor everywhere you turned?


This is Ayser Salman’s story. First comes Emigration, then Naturalization, and finally Assimilation—trying to fit in among her blonde-haired, blue-eyed counterparts, and always feeling left out. On her journey to Americanhood, Ayser sees more naked butts at pre-kindergarten daycare that she would like, breaks one of her parents’ rules (“Thou shalt not participate as an actor in the school musical where a male cast member rests his head in thy lap”), and other things good Muslim Arab girls are not supposed to do. And, after the 9/11 attacks, she experiences the isolation of being a Muslim in her own country. It takes hours of therapy, fifty-five rounds of electrolysis, and some ill-advised romantic dalliances for Ayser to grow into a modern Arab American woman who embraces her cultural differences.


Part memoir and part how-not-to guide, The Wrong End of the Table is everything you wanted to know about Arabs but were afraid to ask, with chapters such as “Tattoos and Other National Security Risks,” “You Can’t Blame Everything on Your Period; Sometimes You’re Going to Be a Crazy Bitch: and Other Advice from Mom,” and even an open letter to Trump. This is the story of every American outsider on a path to find themselves in a country of beautiful diversity.

My Review:
This was a quick and funny read with lots of crazy stories complete with footnotes. Imagine telling all your funny and embarrassing stories from when you were in preschool through adulthood?! It takes a certain amount of courage to tell those stories and Ayser Salman doesn't shy away from sharing how left out she felt--how she always felt like she was at the wrong end of the table. She shares instances where she felt like she was at the wrong end of the table for being "too Muslim", "too American", "too shy", or "too outgoing". She struggled with what many of us did as teens--wanting to be recognized while also wanting to remain invisible. After feeling like she stuck out in a crowd most her life, Salman loved going to college: "I loved my new anonymity. No one cared who I was or looked twice in my direction--and it was bliss." I enjoyed reading about the situations she had that were similar to mine and ones that were unique to her. I especially loved how she used these stories as an opportunity to tell us we should all accept ourselves: "It's okay even if my Muslim behavior is different from the Muslim behavior you expect--all I know is it's real and authentically mine. And I hope that if any of you question your authenticity or legitimacy, you'll give yourselves a break, too.